My name is Sara Grossano, I’m 30, married, with three daughters. I was born in a family of believers in which, thank God, I had the privilege to know Jesus since I was a child; we used to attend the church meetings as a family, so it seemed normal to me to hear talking about God. When I was 14, I began to frequent some friends who led me in the world; I liked it but I didn’t feel fulfilled. I was always looking for new things that generally didn’t bring me to anything at all. So many times my parents scolded me but I didn’t really want to stop.
It went on this way until I was 17, when I got engaged to my husband. According to me, having him meant everything, but I suddenly realized I wanted more. I wanted to be able to do all by myself, that’s why I took the decision to leave home. It was an hard time for everybody, in the first place for my parents dealing with the fact that their little daughter was out of home. In April 2006 my husband Sam and I knew I was pregnant and that we’re expecting our daughter, Valeria. From that moment on, sufferance for us began. In August we married because we realized we’d made a lot of mistakes. We were happy to have a daughter but we couldn’t express the parenthood joy because we’re stifled by our responsibilities. I was happy to be a mother, but then my life became always darker. I felt alone and abandoned. My husband used to work all the time and I couldn’t stand being at home all alone anymore. I was aware of feeling empty and listless but I did nothing to change it. It was every dayworse, so I withdrew into myself, wanting to hear from nobody. My dear ones only wanted my own good, but I perceived it as an attack against me, a meanness. I was scared of death every night before sleeping. It led me to depression from which I thought I couldn’t heal. The only solution for me was to find a house in my parents’ and my sisters’ place area, leaving all behind me, hoping that my emptiness could be filled. For the first two months I thought I had overcome all my life’s lows, but I soon realized that neither my family and husband, nor my kids could fill the emptiness in my heart. My fears kept persecuting me at night, until I knew we’re expecting our second daughter and from that moment on everything changed. After talking to my husband and my parents I wondered what I was really scared of. Then I prayed, asking God to relieve me from my fears and anxiety, giving me happiness. After that I felt freed and loved, but in the first place I recognized what a beautiful family I had, thank God. Today I can testify that even if there still are lows in my life, I know where to find the strength to go on. I found peace with myself and I am happy to be a wife and a mother.